Second by second Olympic handover coverage

Sooooo my worst nightmare, Boris Johnson has appeared, JACKET OPEN. You can’t miss him and his big fat gut because he’s the ONLY MAN on the stage with his white shirt popping out. He can’t wave a flag properly either. *cringe*. You only have yourself to blame London, you thought it would be funny voting him in didn’t you? Well we up North will take no responsibility for him.

Boris never did his jacket up, not even for playboy bunnies.

A bunch of kids have appeared – clearly British. Nice mix of races, always pushing the diversity thing, is our London even when it is painfully obvious; someone black, indian, pakistani, white, chinese, disabled, punk, emo, city worker. They do some dance, a bit messily but very similar to the kind of thing they do for Comic Relief or the ending of Big Brother.

We are broad minded because we picked people of every colour, see?

A red bus appears. Because no one knows what a red bus is. Because it is red its special. Because buses in London are all red, and clean and everyone uses the bus, not the dirty smelly tube.

A little girl brings out a football. She’s very cute. A football….I wonder who will appear later with the ball?

Jimmy Page. Ok, bit of a legend. Leona Lewis! Nothing against the girl but she’s dressed like a wedding cake topping and blearing out muffled noise. There’s a reason why the DIVAS and Opera singers are dragged out for this kind of thing – their voices travel. And she might not even BE big in four years time. Yawnnnnn.

Good for the top of a wedding cake. Bad for anything else

David Beckham has appeared. Wooo! David Beckham! Who gave up real football to go to America to play “soccer” and bare his bulge in various underwear adverts. There’s a man who is dedicated to his sport. Nice cheap way to get cheers since everyone knows the Beckham creature. Urgh. I hope the real 2012 opening ceremony is not full of rubbish stars – god knows it cost enough, we should have real dancers not the members of National Youth Theatre who are only doing it because they were rejected by Hollyoaks (Hollyoaks is a British teatime sort of soap, possibly the worst show that has ever existed for its storylines, acting, everything).

Placido Domingo and a opera singer who looks like a lantern. Yawn. Boris Johnson has tired me out. I have no energy left.

Remember the ugly 2012 logo?:

Someone told me today it looked Lisa Simpson doing something….unmentionable. Do you see it? Now I can’t get the damn image out of my head!

Tired myself out with moaning. Must be hormones. Forgive me.

* Jackie Chan has appeared. The other half has waited 16 days to see Jackie Chan, he loves him for some weird reason.

Related Posts with Thumbnails


  1. Andrea says

    Hi Row!
    Hope you had a great weekend!
    I did not watch the end of the Games, but, yeah… I can clearly see Lisa Simpson doing something there. Jaysus… It’s so bizarre!
    Have a great week!

  2. Helly says

    GREAT analysis lol
    and i thought i was the only one who though he looked -______-”

    and omg; they ‘prettified’ the logo by putting the british flag over it!!! wowwwwwwwwwww . it doesnt help that the shape is still ugly…but i’ve kinda accepted now. mind you, its IS still ugly…but i think i kinda.. got it now?? i dunno LOL

    what else

    oh yes.
    the aussie commentators thought jackie chan was a volunteer, no doubt cos of what he was wearing. -____-“

  3. Row says

    Hey Andrea!

    I am glad you can see it! hehe you won’t be able to see anything else there now!

    My week is going fast, is yours? I so need to sleep x

  4. Row says

    Chica Chica

    Avert your eyes. Yes I am educating everyone to the Lisa Simpson thing. The designers will never live it down!

  5. Row says

    Hi Helly,

    HAhahaha! Jackie Chan is a mere volunteer- eek!

    They have kept the shape of the logo but what they are doing now is just changing the colour scheme over and over which is just rubbish! I think it needs more continuity than having lots of stupid colour schemes!