Non Make Up Related Rant: CSL Sofa Adverts are so bad, they makes me want to punch someone..

…or something.

I mean sofa adverts are the scourge of the earth anyway but this CSL one is takes it to a whole new level. It’s trying to give you a narrative, a storyline, a la Nescafe Gold Blend and demonstrate the passing of time a la John Lewis except, John Lewis’s advert used effective editing and actors to demonstrate this, and also left you with a warm fuzzy feeling.

This one uses unsubtle captions like: 9 months later….6 years later….8 years later (is this cumulative years?!)

Observe:

Wow, doesn’t that fill you with a sense of positivity in life and a renewed faith in marriage?

I particularly like the sinister look the husband gives his ex-wife as he’s leaving with his identical-to-his-wife-anyway-dolly-bird-girlfriend…It’s a look that screams “IF ONLY YOU GAVE IT UP MORE OFTEN! THIS IS YOUR FAULT!”

And what next? The wife (who hasn’t aged in 8 years) is left alone, having handed her son over to the hussy and the other hussy. She is alone. Melancholy. If that was me I would have beat down the bitch…and his girlfriend.

But hey! At least she still has a sofa! Cos that’s all us girls need when our lives fall apart. A nice white leather sofa.

See, the superstitious Chinese part of me would associate CSL sofa’s forever with negative energy after that advert. I am REJECTING your negativity, Mr Sofa! I sure as hell won’t be buying theirs for a marital home!

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Comments

  1. Ohmygod. I had to watch that twice.

    Happy fucking ever after.

    I’m depressed now. Thanks CSL.

  2. lol…these CSL/DFS/Cousins adverts have always been a pet peeve of mine…usually have to switch over when they come on, they’re so bad…so this is actually the first time I’ve watched it all the way through…man, that is seriously bad advertising! What a message to send out, your marriage may break down but at least your sofa won’t!

  3. omg one of the worst adverts ever!! who thinks of these!!!

  4. Glad to know it’s not just me who finds them depressing! Still, atleast they are memorable, but makes you wonder how they will top that concept. I dread to think..

  5. Glad to find others who agree with me – who ever thought that they could sell sofas like this! I certainly won’t buy one from a company who predict that I will get divorced….

    ….and if I did I wouldn’t want to keep the marital sofa!

  6. all comments above i notice are women,your meant to look at the sofas not the ladys. very pretty ladys. god yous women are in envy of these girls.probably pissed off because they have what you proably will never have ; a decent carcuss.
    the song is sung brilliant by steph spencer.

  7. wtf

    wtf

    w t f

    Aww, they’re having a baby! Aw, he’s wearing a little school blazer! Aw, they’re … yelling at each other? Oh … he’s leaving her and taking the kid. DAMN I WANT A SOFA NOW

    I think “paa baa” is right, I’m soooo jealous of those actresses, that must be why I think this commercial is one of the worst ever made. Clever, clever commenter!

  8. many thanks for your honesty erin

  9. I knew I wasn’t alone in thinking CSL (along with 90% of other home furnishing stores) ads are completely unbearable. I hate them with a passion! The adverts made by the contestants on ‘the apprentice’ are more tasteful. Does anyone know the ad companies that have regurgitated them onto our screens? I need to have a word with them.

    Even if CSL do have a permanent sale (ha ha) with triple savings (whatever) I would never even step foot across they’re threshold, purely because of these horrendous excuses for adverts. Phew

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