Boo Hiss.

Urgh. The Apprentice made me physically sick. Just some highlights – essentially this week, they just have to make greeting cards for new occasions.

BTW – Miss Piggy Claire, says that Matt Lucas has ‘short man syndrome’ – and she has? Fat Orange Cow Syndrome.

Ideas they got –

Jenny Big Chin’s idea – Eco cards. Cards with an Eco message? Isn’t that called flyering? I doubt anyone truly eco friendly would send daft cards to each other – what a waste of paper! Then she drops a clanger – she says she would buy LESS cards because she cares about the environments – probably not good to say that to Clinton Cards.

Single Mum Card – Well Done! Your A Single Mum! – this is not a dig by the way, my mama was a single parent and there are a hundred reasons why people end up in that situation – but I mean sending a card to celebrate it? Most single mums get on fine thanks, chocolates would be much better than wasting a tree.

Singles Day – Unfortunately, it is the day before Valentines day. Lets think, whilst stores are grabbing all of our money selling us cards, furry toys that were made in China for 10p and champagne, all in the hope to get laid, would the stores sacrifice that for Singles Day? Of course not.

Helene – ‘A lot of my ideas come from my head’ – Really? Cos I thought they came from your ass.

Claire – EYE- TALICS. E-TALICS, Miss Piggy, stop trying to mask your northern-yorkshire accent.

Alex – awful he said nothing did nothing but bite his lips and pull a face at everything. GET HIM OUT.

Jenny Big Chin meanwhile tries to pull in Saira, who actually thought of the best idea, cards for different cultural celebrations, and get her kicked out. Very manipulative.

The prize for the winning team was a recital by Myleene Klass – isn’t that punishment?

When it came to boardroom time, the knives came out for little Saira. Kevin (Matt Lucas) is a spineless, pathetic, weasley piece of rubbish who doesn’t deserve to call himself a man. He had a Porche by 23? Good, because you’ll never get a woman.

The evil team ganged up on Saira, to save their own skin. Did she do that much – I don’t know because they didn’t show it. But I know that poncey pretty boy Alex did even less. I know that big chin Jenny thought of a completely crap idea. I know that Claire did what she did best; sabotaging people, but being disruptive and not helping when she could have.

Matt Lucas is such a thick head. If he had taken in Big Chin, he might have survived. Idiot.

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  1. MandyPandy says

    Kevin sorta reminds me of a young Thomas Dolby. “She blinded me with science!”

  2. Row says

    haaaaaaaaaa thats funny Mandy. I know! They were tearing him to pieces on breakfast tv today.

  3. Row says

    But Mand, who do you dislike? I have to say I dislike ALL OF THEM apart form Raef!

  4. MandyPandy says

    To be honest, I hate them ALL! This is ‘The Apprentice’ we’re talking about”. Think about the kinds of people who sign on; by default no ones going to have any redeeming qualities. Every season of TA has it’s creepolas: Katie Hopkins, Syed Ahmed.

    You’re right though, of the lot Raef is the hardest to hate (on account of his charity work). I hate him for his name alone.

    I miss Celebrity Big Brother.

  5. Chica says

    I agree with the Raef love even if he is the strangest person alive- I kinda liked Lucinda to start with but she’s so effin stupid I don’t anymore.
    …and yet even though I hate pretty much everyone (i’m sure Raef will turn out to be an eijit before the end) I still can’t tear myself away from the telly when it’s on.